Jonty Skrufff's Blog

Click on the picture to hear Ghost Machine on Radio 1

Click here to hear Judge Jules spinning my new remix of Dare and Haste’s Ghost Machine on his Radio 1 show (which went out live on Friday February 7). This is the second week running Jules has played the track: to hear it in full click here (or click on the soundcloud widget on the right)

It’s 42 minutes along (you can scroll along easily by dragging the slider if you’re in a rush..;-)))))

click on the picture to see if you can beatmatch 2 youtube videos

click here to try and beat-match 2 youtube clips (tricky!)

Tyson being interviewed (click on the picture)

Mike in action:

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click on the picture to rate real men’s manboobs here: NOT REALLY SAFE FOR WORK- or the squeamish!!!)

Breast obsessed British tabloid The Sun published a man boob special this week and revealed some simple hands-on techniques for telling if you’re in danger of developing ‘D cup Bloke-zookas’.

“Often, man “breasts” are actually just fat: You won’t be able to feel any firm tissue, just lard,” Sun medical expert Dr Keith Hopcroft advised. “Clues are that both sides are affected equally and they wobble when you run.”

more man boobs

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Staying Alive

The Daily Telegraph advised single men to hide their obsessions, buy decent footwear (‘shoes are, still, terrifyingly important to women, for some reason’) and ‘learn to dance, or at least be willing to dance’ this week, in a new guide to finding love in the twenty-first century.

“Obviously, it’s mortifying, but dancing seems to be a big thing for some women,” the newspaper revealed, “It may become less of an issue in later life, but we doubt it.” (Telegraph)
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Germany Calling: Gay Gothic Valentine’s Day

This month’s show has a distinct gay/ gothic tinge angled around Jonty Skrufff’s upcoming gig in Prague supporting Jimmy Sommerville as well as his brand new ‘Gothic Horror’ remix of Dare & Haste’s techno anthem Ghost Machine

Fidelity Kastrow meanwhile gets in the (Torture Garden) Valentine’s Day mood, showcasing the Carl Craig (or is that Carl Crack?) remix of Hot Chip’s One Life Stand and Peter Horrevorts’ devastatingly powerful new techno monster Bloody Hands.

Jonty’s remix of Motor’s Death Rave is currently up for a highly prestigious Quartz Award in France (having been chosen from over 4,000 tracks) and kickstarts the show in suitably slamming fashion, with Kylie and Bauhaus tossed in for good measure (in homage to still under-the-weather missing link Mark Reeder)

ChakraView Festival flyer

Indian officials have cancelled this weekend’s Chakraview festival just hours before the massive three day ‘Ecological Festival’ was due to start near Agonda village in Goa (on February 5)

Local politician Deepak Desai told reporters he removed the license from the professionally organized psy-trance party after becoming concerned about potential drug use, following sudden widespread negative coverage in Indian media.

The media reports began just three days before Chakraview was due to start when the Goa Herald reporting that the festival was under the police scanner’. The India Times also weighed in, revealing that Canacona councilor Vijay Pai Khot had previously been unaware of the event though was now officially concerned.

“I do not know about it,: Councillor Khot told IANS, “ Festivals like this should not be allowed here’.

Goa police chief Yadav was similarly suddenly alarmed and vowed to investigate.

“I have asked them (subordinates) to check whether there are any illegalities,” he told the Times Of India, “If we find any illegality, we will stop the party.”

Scores of local and international DJs from Israel, Russia, Italy and beyond including Atomic Pulse, Z-Machine, Yeti and Arjuna were listed on the festival’s website and facebook page though details were removed from the main site one day before. The site otherwise made no reference to the cancellation and instead continued presenting itself as  ‘the first ecologic music festival in the most beautiful jungle of Agonda’.

Promising ‘3 days of life in the most basic form of earth . . . by the stream, with treehouses, organic farm, birds, flowers, fruits and all nature:  truely a haven!!  (sic)” the site also stressed that admission would be strictly controlled.

“The venue details will be restricted to the invitees of the festival,” the site message promised, “In order to guard the privacy and exclusivity of the festival by filtering the right people and energy.”

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ravers in the bunker

Halifax party police who busted a rave at an abandoned bunker last weekend did so because they feared badly positioned generators could have poisoned clubbers, they claimed this week.

“Certainly, there is the concern that had it not been shut down,  . . . people could have suffered the effects of the carbon monoxide,” police spokesman Brian Palmeter told reporters.

“Officers commented how overwhelming the exhaust fumes were and actually ended up calling Halifax regional fire and emergency service because of that, and because of the unresponsive female we found there,” he added.

As police moved in to stop the party in the early hours, numerous revellers, some dressed in skimpy club clothes, scattered into the surrounding snow covered forest, press reports said. Others from amongst the 120 clubbers present were left shivering outside the bunker in sub zero temperatures for up to four hours with no transport back to town.

ravers forced out into the snow

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Playgirl's Daniel Nardicio (left)

Playgirl magazine magnate Daniel Nardicio chatted to Skrufff this week about his upcoming mission to persuade Iris Robinson’s adulterous teenage lover Kirk McCambley to strip for the American adult magazine and said he’s confident of success.

“I understand he wants to come to America- so I plan on offering him an all expenses paid trip to New York City, and probably money, that always helps,” the Playgirl Marketing chief explained.

“If that doesn’t work I can probably work out a deal where he can bang Pamela Anderson- the ULTIMATE cougar. What Irish boy could resist? That’s like fucking the American Flag!” he enthused.

The erstwhile New York gay sex club promoter flies into Belfast shortly to try and track down the now 21 year old toyboy, who became famous last month after he was outed as the secret lover of married evangelical Christian politician Iris Robinson, 61. Mrs Robinson (who remains married to fellow top fellow Ulster politician Peter Robinson) seduced him when he was just 19, grooming the innocent teenager with a £50,000 loan to start a café, which she arranged via friendly developers.

While the affair remained secret, the flamboyant born-again Christian publically compared gays to child molesters and murderers, shamelessly using the Bible to defend herself when faced with accusations of bigotry.

“People have attempted to suggest that I indicated that homosexuality was a mental health issue. Nothing could be further from the truth,” she told the Belfast Telegraph in 2008, “What I did say was homosexuality, like all sin, is an abomination,” she corrected.
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click on the picture for more Riva Starr

“I come from Naples, the city where if a black cat crosses your path, you have to wait for someone else to walk that way first. But I don’t believe in that shit, I’m convinced that you build your own life with your choices, good or bad. Then sometimes fate can help you.”

That London based Italian producer Stefano Miele has taken charge of his destiny is immediately apparent from a cursory glance at his musical CV.  Labouring in relative obscurity for the first seven years (during which he released two albums and thrived for a period in the breaks scene) he found near instant success when he reinvented himself as Riva Starr three years ago, courtesy of the blogs and more importantly via the sheer quality of his music.

Giving away infectiously club friendly electro house stormers (and a few mash-ups along the way) on the blogs he rapidly built up an online fanbase which soon included the likes of uber-hot tastemaker DJs Jesse Rose and Claude Von Stroke, both of whom released his tracks.

“I would say they were both absolutely crucial to my career,” says Stefan, paying tribute to their support.

“I moved to house because of their tunes,” he continues, “I believe they are on top of their game and they really help upcoming prodicers to develop their sound and move forwards. I’m really happy to be part of the family.”

That he’s close to Jesse Rose in particular, is confirmed by the fact that Rose’s uber-hot Berlin house label Made To Play is releasing his new Riva Starr album ‘If Life Gives You Lemons, Make Lemonade’ next month, plus first single from the album Dance Me.  While the single’s a straight up Berghain style club track (remixed to perfection by Made 2 Play’s in-house engineer Oliver $) the album is considerably more eclectic, reflecting the fact he viewed it differently from stringing together a bunch of club tracks, says Stefano.

“Making the album was definitely more complicated than arriving at the studio, smoking a couple of joints and write down a bangin’ loop for da’ club,” he smiles.

“I tried to make it interesting and full of variety while still reflecting my musical taste. If anyone thinks that I put all those influences in there because I wanted to please the audience then they’re wrong; I just like it like that.”
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