Barefoot Doctor Bit: Is It Ever OK to Use Someone & Feign Friendship?
Barefoot Doctor: “We all use each other – that’s the definition of the interdependent style of social construct we live in here – we use the guy selling computers to buy our computers, the woman booking gigs to get our work, the florist for our flowers, the blacksmith for our horse shoes, the internet provider for our connection and so on. The trouble begins when we abuse each other.
Abuse comes in many forms and perhaps one of the more insidious is being fake to someone. When you’re pretending to be one thing, while secretly operating with an entirely different agenda, in order to lull someone into a false sense of security so you can subsequently take advantage of them, thus leaving them worse off, you are abusing them.
This applies whether in business or social contexts but is especially unsavory in the social/personal context -abusing someone’s friendship, love and goodwill to take advantage of them.
And while it might yield a short-term gain, in the longer term, you lose your own integrity, and with that your personal power, so ultimately weaken yourself – plus you start earning a negative not-to-be-trusted reputation, which will make it harder to operate in future.
Friendship is one of the most precious gifts life has to offer. Friendship makes the world and your passage through it warm and caring – it gives it meaning and shape. Abuse friendship and it will remove its magic from your life, thus leaving you bereft of meaning and warmth. But use friends for sure and let them use you in return – that makes the world go round – it’s all about reciprocity.”
Questions by Skrufff.