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French pop dance maestro David Guetta’s ability to polarise opinion was emphasised by the British press this week, via a series of wildly contrasting reviews of shows he performed in front of tens of thousands of revellers in London, Liverpool and Belfast.

Belfast Telegraph reporter Alan Lewis branded his ‘amazing, spectacular set’ at the Belsonic Festival a ‘runaway success’, adding ‘Guetta was obviously having as much fun as the crowd, who literally bounced the night away’.

Creamfields reporter Natalie Evans was similarly impressed.

“The star hosted “the biggest party on the planet”,” she wrote in a euphoric review in local news portal Click Liverpool, “with an awe-inspiring set of chart, electro-pop and old school anthems.”

Guardian music critic Ian Gittins, however, appeared to endure a far less ecstatic experience at London’s LED Festival in Victoria Park, moaning about it taking place ‘in a mud bath under ominous grey skies and sporadic downpours’.

“French DJ/producer David Guetta has enjoyed four UK No 1 singles in the last year, a fact he continually repeated during a monumentally depressing headline set of cheesy club anthems spun from the top of a garish 30ft podium,” Gittins grumbled.

“Guetta may be a house music titan but he will always sound like a Top Shop in-store DJ who got lucky,” he complained.

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Australian newspaper The Herald Sun reported that the country’s newest political organisation the Sex Party had a ‘strong election result’ this week, after they fielded candidates for the first time for the Senate.

The influential newspaper also labelled the Sex Party ‘a potentially potent force in Victoria’ after they out performed almost all Australia’s fringe parties, coming close to even toppling ultra-conservative moralists ‘Family First’.

The Sex Party was approved by the electoral commission just 12 months ago and attracted immediate support by attacking ‘morals campaigners and prudish politicians’ making ‘behind the scenes handshakes with religious leaders’.

Writing on their website they also condemned the ‘appalling sloganeering’ of mainstream politicians (including Obama’s ‘Yes We Will’) labelling it a ‘blatant attempt to brainwash people’.

“It’s patronising and dangerous,” they added, “It borders on dictatorship-style politics and is devoid of any vision.”

The party also proposes decriminalising drugs, ‘total equal rights in all areas of the law including same sex marriage’ and reversing the policy which allows ‘the mandatory retention of all Australian users’ internet browsing history and emails by ISPs for at-will inspection by law enforcement agencies’.

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Their promising start is likely to encourage stripper and ‘erotic actress’ turned Brazilian parliamentary candidate Adriely Fatal, who this week stepped up her campaign to be elected as an MP in Brazil’s upcoming general election with a high profile interview with the Guardian.

Chatting to the British newspaper, the 23 year old Christian Workers Party candidate said she’s hoping to introduce strip clubs and more hospitals in every town and said she’d been inspired by legendary hardcore porn star turned Italian MP Cicciolina.

“I’m using sensuality to attract votes – I’m trying to attract young people and men,” Ms Fatal explained. “I’m going to concentrate on healthcare and on showing people that just because I use tight clothes it doesn’t mean that I can’t do a proper job,” she added.

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Authorities in Mexico discovered the bodies of 72 people murdered and buried at a farm in Tamaulipas, close to Texas this week, in the latest horrifying escalation of the drugs war sweeping the country.

The tally came on top of 229 other murder victims’ bodies discovered this week, four of whom were left hanging from a bridge in Cuernavaca, after being decapitated and castrated. Two more men’s bodies were also found hanging from a road bridge near Chilpancingo, both of which had had both arms chopped off.

Leading UK commentator Johan Hari blamed the killings entirely on prohibition and suggested drug legalisation could cripple the ultra-violent drug cartels.

“Legalisation would bankrupt them swiftly, and entirely,” he predicted.

“Nobody kills to sell you a glass of Jack Daniels. Nobody beheads police officers or shoots teenagers to sell you a glass of Budweiser,” he pointed out.

“And, after legalisation, nobody would do it to sell you a spliff or a gram of cocaine either. They would be in the hands of unarmed, regulated, legal businesses, paying taxes to the state, at a time when we all need large new sources of tax revenue,” he said (Independent )

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The newspaper he was writing for the Independent (who in the past campaigned for cannabis decriminalisation in the UK before changing their minds) agreed.

“If Americans lost their taste for drugs, the Mexican cartels would be out of business. That, however, will not happen; indeed the forbidden nature of drugs may make them more attractive,’ the Independent noted, “So why not legalise them?”

Tijuana human rights expert Victor Clark Alfaro, however, predicted little will change in the foreseeable future, despite increasing calls for legalization from influential opinion formers around the world.

“It’s mainly supported by intellectuals and academia, but it doesn’t have the sympathy of the population as a whole,” he pointed out. “Nor does it (decriminalization) have the support of the US government,” he said.

(Spectator/ Daily Telegraph columnist/ self confessed spliff smoker, (inadvertent) ketamine user (he thought it was MDMA) libertarian James Delingpole: “Since the dawn of time man has always been possessed of an urge to get out of his box — be it via mushrooms, datura, aluminium wheel cleaning fluid, claret, or psychedelic reindeer pee. It’s what we do. Nothing could be more natural. Why waste time, money and lives fighting nature . . ?”)

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A new study of British women’s sexual preferences has revealed that 85% prefer ‘real men’ with body hair, prompting mega-media organisation the Press Association to declare that the ‘modern “metrosexual” man has had his day.’

The Daily Mail went even further.

“Only 8 per cent of women said they liked their men groomed to perfection,” the notoriously body image obsessed tabloid reported, “Narrowly beating the 7 per cent who preferred to see a werewolf-like quantity of hair.”

Details of the latest study (by pillow company Sound Asleep) emerged just as the New York Times published an article headlined ‘if your boyfriend is metrosexual’ in which the US newspaper highlighted the latest must-have accessory for fashion conscious men: a US$295 handbag.

“There are boyfriend jeans; now there’s a boyfriend bag,” the Times trumpeted.

“Rebecca Minkoff’s BF bag is leather, with a sturdy chain designed to be worn messenger style. Fall colors include electric orange, olive and gray.”

Also in the States, trendy vicar type Mark Driscoll (described by Newsweek as being ‘among America’s most prominent young Christian voices’) took aim at both metrosexuals and retrosexuals this week, complaining that both demographics are part of a ‘Peter Pan Syndrome epidemic where men want to remain boys forever.’

“A buddy of mine calls them evangellyfish because they have no backbone,” he sneered, “Girlfriends, gal friends with benefits, and miscellaneous other mannies (nannies for men) need to know this: you want a guy you can marry and have babies with. You don’t want to marry a guy who’s a baby,” he recommended.

JesusorSatan.com: Christians have already taken the MARK OF THE BEAST! Satan is the master of deception. You have put the MARK OF THE BEAST everywhere.  GOOD Christians will write this off as a COINCIDENCE! . . .’)

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EMI records chief Miles Leonard chatted to Skrufff this week about the major label’s new strategy of signing all round ‘360º’ deals with the likes of Deadmau5 and the Swedish House Mafia and revealed that music sales are no longer the major label’s primary focus.

“We can’t just rely on selling CDs and digital downloads to survive any more and to move with the times you need to be a very rounded company,” said Miles.

“So in doing that, that means you open the doors to signing deals with artists out there who have very successful businesses that aren’t necessarily centred on their albums. Their album may just be the conduit that drives people to go to their live shows, whereas the album itself may not sell a huge amount. But if the live shows do, we may still want to invest in that person as a company,” he said.

Joining Virgin as a lowly talent scout in 1992 Miles brought the Verve to the EMI offshoot as his very first signing before being unceremoniously fired as a result of a classic major label power game. Rejoining EMI via Parlophone in 1993 as an A&R, he went on to sign the likes of the Beta Band and Eric Prydz before sealing his reputation in signing then transforming Coldplay and Kylie into global mega-million selling pop stars.

17 years on he remains at the top of EMI’s hierarchy as Parlophone Managing Director overseeing merchandising, synching (licensing tracks to commercials and connecting bands with brands) and ‘360 deals’, involving all aspects of bands- and DJs’- careers.

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“The Swedish House Mafia are signed to EMI through Virgin and that deal is an all round 360º one where we have invested in them not just as producers or recording artists but as a company. As an entity, as a business,” said Miles.

“So we have involvement in everything they do from the shows worldwide to the residency at Pacha (Ibiza) to merchandise: absolutely everything. It’s a 360º deal where we’ve invested in them,” he said.

“And that’s the same deal that’s in place with Deadmau5, again with Virgin, through EMI. We’ve gone into business with Deadmau5, not just for his records but a deal with his business as a whole,” he explained.

Miles also pointed out that last year EMI signed burlesque dancer Immodesty Blaise to the label despite the fact she doesn’t make any music at all.

“We’re investing in her show and she’ll be performing at corporate events for example, they’ll also be a book, a film, and a number of other things. We thought it would be an interesting project to branch out into that isn’t just about music,” he said.

His assessment of the erotic dancer’s potential matched that of the writer behind her official biography on her website who she’s fast becoming a national treasure’ off the back of her ‘impressive client roster including top names such as Dior, Cartier, and Damien Hirst’.

“Immodesty is also an acclaimed writer,” the press release also notes, “Her debut novel ‘Tease’- her first foray into the genre of ‘bonkbuster’ fiction garnered five star reviews and became a top ten bestseller.”

Miles Leonard will be appearing as a keynote speaker at the Amsterdam Dance Event in October.

http://www.immodestyblaize.com/

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Councillors in Tower Hamlets have started pasting ‘cancelled’ stickers across party posters illicitly displayed on walls in the East London borough in an imaginative tactic to deter fly poster companies.

“We’re showing would-be fly-posters that they’ll be wasting their money if they put up illegal advertisements in the borough,” Councillor Shahed Ali explained in a statement.

“It can take up to 45 minutes to remove just one poster and often scraps of paper are left behind – but it only takes a couple seconds stick the ‘It’s Cancelled’ sticker on. This is a creative way to crack down on fly-posting,” he added.

In more East London clubland news acclaimed Shoreditch triangle venue Plastic People reopened recently after a 6 week hiatus ordered by the police.

Writing on the wall of Facebook group ‘Keep Plastic People Alive’ when the club re-opened on July 24, Plastic People spokesperson ‘Deck Queenz’ said they’ve introduced a compulsory 1.45am no more admission rule and issued an apologetic statement thanking the police for the new regulations.

“Due to proper concerns about the use of illegal drugs in Plastic People and the sale of alcohol after permitted hours on 11 February 2010 Hackney Police lodged a Review of Plastic People’s Premises Licence. The management of Plastic People accept that the police concerns were justified and have been working closely with the police to ensure standards are improved,” they said.

“Plastic People has a zero tolerance attitude to drugs and are grateful for the assistance of police in highlighting these serious issues,” the statement added.

Urban 75′s flyposting guide; click HERE

Hackney Council on Flyposting: (‘Fly-posting refers to putting posters on trees, street furniture, post boxes, walls, buildings and telephone boxes without the permission of the council. It is an illegal, anti-social activity that creates a negative impression of an area and contributes to people’s fear of crime . . .’)

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America’s anti-drug secret police force the DEA (Drug Enforcement Administration) in Atlanta have published ‘help wanted’ adverts on their website looking for nine candidates able to understand ‘ebonics’, the term for ‘street slang’ language used by predominantly African Americans.

The Guardian reported this week that the DEA need ebonics speakers to interpret drug dealers recorded on wiretaps using phrases such as ‘is he shook?’ (meaning ‘is he scared?’) and ‘I need a re-up’ (meaning ‘I need resupplying’, usually with drugs).

“A lot of times people think you’re just dealing with a few slang words, and that you can finesse your way around it,” Stanford University language expert Professor John Rickford told AP ,” And it’s not – it’s a big vocabulary. You’ll have some significant differences,” he added.

Details of the DEA plan were revealed just as the Wall Street Journal reported that psychologists and drug counselors are reporting unprecedented levels of drug use amongst merchant bankers in the States, suggesting linguists conversant with Wall Street patois could be even more effective.

Brad Lamm from Intervention Specialists told the Wall Street Journal that many of his executives clients are hooked on powder cocaine and crack, adding ‘the titans of Wall Street normalize crazy behavior all the time’. Robert Curry from rehab company Turning Point For Leaders agreed.

“Investment bankers — gunslingers, as we call them — are highly prone to addiction,” he said, “And there’s a lot of denial among employers. The attitude is: ‘If they can’t fix themselves, then they’re going to have to live with it. We’re not going to put any time and effort into it.’ (Wall Street Journal)

http://www.turningpointforleaders.com/ (‘When it comes to identifying addictions, one should remember that “if you suspect there is a problem, there probably is one.” People with addictions are so driven to continue using drugs or alcohol that they are very cunning at hiding the problem, not only from others but also from themselves. They often fail to see the inevitable changes in their functioning at work, home and with friends; changes that are invariably noticed by others . . .’)

Ebonic Phrase book: ‘Sup? – How are you?’; ‘Beeatsh – Woman/female friend’; ‘Ho/Hizzle/Hizza – Woman/female friend’:  Phrases NOT to be used: ‘Da bomb – (replaced with “dat hotness”

DEA Special Agent Careers: Before You Apply: ‘Applicants who are found, through investigation or personal admission, to have experimented with or used narcotics or dangerous drugs, except those medically prescribed, will not be considered for employment with DEA. Exceptions to this policy may be made for applicants who admit to limited youthful and experimental use of marijuana . . .’)

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Ex Manumission dance Mariana Truffi L. Ribiero remains one of the best known personalities in Ibiza working constantly as a DJ and model while booking the dates for a growing number of island DJs.

“Allister was one of a kind.

There is no Allister type.

One of these unique figures that press manage to miss.

He knew better than anyone else I met how to be free, to be who you want to and enjoy life.

Everyone wanted to know him, to talk to him, to take pictures or simply wave from far. He was “The great maestro”.

I was really amazed to see, just by walking in a room, how much energy Allister was able to move.

And there he was…looking fab. Like a book or movie character that came alive. He was the king of entertainment. He was the last breath of studio 54.

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One of his favorites stories was when we used to go from Manumission to Carry On at Space and ending at Bora Bora.

Just one detail, we still have the same outfits from Manumission. That means Allister was wearing his black suit on the beach. We laughed until we were exhausted then walked down the beach as if was a catwalk. Everyone is looking at us. Some guy comes up to Allister and say: “Your music is the best! You are God to me!”  The guy has mistaken Allister for Sven Vath! We look at each other and decided to keep the story going just for fun. So Allister signs an autograph for the guy and after talking about how good a DJ he was for an hour , the guy decides to go and get a gift to Allister, a stick of lip gloss. Ha ha ha ha.

After losing our voices from having so much fun we decided to leave because Allister realized he’d left his bag at Space, again. That was a weekly journey.

We are walking on the street just before Space and a car breaks in the midle of the street with a girl shouting inside like ” Oh my God! Thats him!!!”. She jumps out of the car and runs up to Allister and takes a picture with him. I couldnt believe my eyes. I said: Allister you stopped the traffic’.

Yes, my darling!” he replied,  ”Come with me and I’ll make you famous.”

I felt very lucky to have  such a character as a friend, so much so that I never minded if I had to stay behind him catching the stuff he would drop or help him to find stuff he would lose or handle him when he was annoying. He was my inspiration. He will always be in my heart and in my favorites life stories.

And I will tell my kids and grand kids a story of a fabolous man full of great tales. ”

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Balearic club promoter and erstwhile Manumission icon Allister Logue has died after falling beneath a tube train at Charing Cross.

The silver-haired 56 year old make-up artist’s death, which press reports suggested was suicide, prompted a rash of heartfelt tributes from some of the key figures from Ibiza’s alternative Bohemian elite, reflecting his status as one of the leading characters on the island’s club scene of the last 25 years.

Describing him as ‘a mischievous soul always ready for adventure laced with a straight vodka’ Claire Manumission spoke fondly about the key role he played in Manumission parties, leading the legendarily flamboyant processions around the island for over 10 years.

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“Allister possessed a beauty or strangeness far beyond anything we could sit down and imagine for ourselves. Unique, irreplaceable, individual, a fabulous creature from a mythical time, a time that no longer exists but that we were fortunate enough to live through together. He is a part of us, part of a time gone by, a lost time, a lost world,” said Claire.

“ Love you Ali… Forever in my heart and in my high heels . . . As you so often told me, I would have been nothing without you,” she added.

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Manumission dancer Gabby Sanderson (nowadays better known as Ibiza Rocks resident DJ Tart With A Heart) described him as ‘flamboyant, creative, eccentric, an Ibiza character, nay legend’ and predicted his ‘legacy will remain’.

“You were a pain in the arse, but you were our fabulous pain in the arse,” she told Skrufff.

“Dizzy, a diva, an outrageous personality with a kind heart and a sensitive soul you masked in silks, sequins and outspokenness. Ibiza won’t be the same without you. I wouldn’t have been the same without you . . . My friend, our friend, forever. Allister Logue,” she said.

Legendary former Manumission DJ Andy Carroll concurred.

“Allister was a larger than life eternally slight Ibiza character you could either love or be indifferent about,” said Andy.

“Most people I know from ‘La Famalia Manumission’ loved Allister. In his Manumission years I would see him first in the girls’ dressing room doing his ‘super-star’ hair and make-up styling and then when the lipstick, powder and paint was completed he would spin onto the bar in the Coco-Loco, twirling and carrying on into the sunrise, at Carry-on @ Space, Bora-Bora and beyond.”

“Always ready with a dry comment and a sharp wit, we will forever remember Allister and his Ibiza town side-kick companion (his pooch) Chupito with fond memories,” said Andy.

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Alternative islanders Lenny Ibizarre and Skrufff contributor Barefoot Doctor also paid tribute using similar language to all three of the Manumission team.

“This is such a tragedy,” Lenny Ibizarre told Skrufff. “Allister Logue was an icon of the Ibizan night. He had flair and was loved by all. He will be dearly missed.”

“He was a brave, outrageous, courageous soul, who always spread a good vibe, at least whenever I met him’,” said Barefoot Doctor.

“He was a shoosher-upper (booster) of the atmosphere and we all need one of them from time to time,” Barefoot continued. “And though I’m sure when your number’s up, it’s up, whether you kill yourself or let life do it for you, it does feel tragic and he’s certainly missed by the many who loved him here in Ibiza.”

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Dave Gilmour’s official online blog has issued a convoluted statement about the role the Pink Floyd guitarist played on the Orb’s upcoming album Metallic Spheres in which the writer concluded ‘(David) was working on an album with The Orb. Sort of.’

The blog posting followed months of online rumours about the Pink Floyd/ Orb collaboration which appeared validated on Dave Gilmour’s main site this week when a picture of the album’s artwork appeared bearing the artist name ‘The Orb featuring David Gilmour’. However, Gilmour’s semi-official blogger insisted it isn’t quite so.

“David is not working with The Orb on a new album, contrary to some reports,” the blog posting declared.

“But you may remember that he had been in the studio jamming with Martin “Youth” Glover in recent months, who was at the time working on an ambient mix of the ‘Chicago’ re-recording . . . Alex Paterson was not involved in the sole jamming session and the only plan initially was for David to play guitar on that one track – ‘Chicago’.

However, as it turns out and as you can see, the result of that jam session has now been spread across the next Orb album, Metallic Spheres, which will be released as ‘The Orb featuring David Gilmour’,” he added.

The virtual presence of Gilmour’s guitar playing (and vocals) on the album is sure to provoke massive additional interest from the armies of devoted Pink Floyd fans and provide a welcome boost to the career of Orb mainman Alex Patterson, long one of dance culture’s most esoteric and idiosyncratic characters.

Chatting to Skrufff in 2004 he singled out Orb hits Little Fluffy Clouds and A Huge Ever Growing Pulsating Brain as ‘the two main cornerstones of The Orb’ adding ‘If it wasn’t for those two tracks we wouldn’t have got anywhere, the other tracks would have been seen as being just good tracks’.  He also revealed he had no intentions of quitting music (‘If I had the money I’d love to become an explorer and go on adventures, to find ancient cities in the jungle; but it’s not the 19th century”) and shared intriguing opinions on the afterlife.

“Our own egos have to believe that something happens after death, because we’re much too intelligent just to die,” said Alex.

“What we need to find is some kind of formula that gives us longevity in life so that we can actually reproduce the real power in our brains. But it that happened, we’d all become genuine supermen and there would be far too much of an overspill of population. So right now it’s still about keeping that formula from ancient alchemy, down.”

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